Gossip Girl Review: Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked

So, weird title right?  Nah, it’s just to show you how random I am in my music taste.

This is late, again, but I had a really bad day yesterday, I thought I lost my house keys and I didn’t get home till super late.

Anyway, enough about me, let’s get down to brass tax.  This review is going to be slightly different since it is the mid-season finale.  I will give you a quick little review and then talk about each character.  Which is so something I won’t do every time because I don’t like all the characters.  Oh FYI, this is so not in the order that it actually showed up on TV.

I started writing a longer review, it ended up being something like you would read on TWoP.  So I am going to try to summarize this for you all in 4 paragraphs or less.  Here we go:

Ivy is getting a party thrown for her again.  Dan and Serena are still fighting but they make up, big freaking whoop!  Rufus finally realizes that Dan is in love with Blair, even though he (Rufus) claims to be observant, um yeah… So Dan decides to call Blair who is being harassed by the paparazzi both outside and inside of her house and is looking for a quick way to get away because she is sick of wearing her big ass engagement ring.  That thing is bigger than her baby bump.  Anyway, Blair decides to move in with Dan, while Nate and Chuck are talking about the fact that Blair might be cancelling the wedding.  Apparently Chuck is stalking Blair through print media, but is still trying to act like he doesn’t care, I don’t buy it and neither does Nate.

Meanwhile Max decides to torture Ivy some more and tells her that he is going to sell her story.  Ivy panics.  But not to worry, no one is gonna buy that because she already went to Nate and I’m sure with all of his connections he will make sure that Max will get shut down, oh wait, I think that is actually what he said to Max.  But Serena can’t be bothered with any of this because she just figured out that the best person for her to be with is Dan, who cares if he feels the same way.  Too bad overly observant Rufus didn’t notice that his step-daughter is “in love” with his son.  Cause he told her that Dan has decided to man up and tell Blair how he feels.  And guess what, GG just told them both where Dan is.  Rufus = 😀 Serena = FML

Fast forward past Chuck and Louis, with Serena’s help, cause she doesn’t care whose life she ruins so long as she gets what she wants, chasing down Blair to the party.  Where Max tells Ivy, oh be careful not to forget who you really, or something as equally as trite.  But since Dan is there with Blair no one has time to think about Ivy because now they (Nate, Ivy, and Serena) are happy to find out that Dan is taking Chuck to Blair.  They reconnect but oh wait, Ivy wants to pull the plug on her party so she tells GG that Blair is there.  And in all the confusion, of the one paparazzi who is shooting off a flash camera, Chuck and Blair rush to their limo that has the break lines cut.  And Nate who is clueless about how to navigate around New York City is following them blindly and watches as the paparazzi swarm around their limo leading up to the big car crash.

Now all of the regulars (minus Blair and Chuck) are gathered at the hospital freaking out.  Nate and Serena want to take down GG.  Dan wants Blair to be alright.  Rufus finds out that Ivy is fraud, and Lily has to play mom to Blair and Chuck, incest much GG?  Oh but wait, Jack, Chuck’s uncle, calls Diane, which he wouldn’t have done but it was necessary because there was an accident…

So on a scale of 1 to 10, being modified of course because this is GG, I would say this was about an 8.  And here is why.  The only storylines that actually made sense where Blair’s, Dan’s, and Chuck’s, and even theirs didn’t really at some points.  Also, this was one of the lamest cliffhangers ever, so maybe this is really a 7.

Today I will be nice Chuckistans, I will start with Chuck.

Chuck:  OMG HE IS NOT GOING TO DIE!!!!  PLEASE STOP ACTING LIKE THIS A BIG EFFING SHOCK TO YOU!!!  Unless you have been living under a rock there is no reason for you to be all upset.  Chuck is going to make it through.  Here was my biggest issue with him.  He told Blair that he was going to love her baby the same way that he loves her.  So does that mean that he is going to make the baby feel like it’s worth less than dirt and then trade it for a hotel and then smack it around a bit?  Cause if so…. Yeah, I’m not cool with that.  Oh FYI, me being nice about Chuck was starting with his character, I still think he needs to go to rehab and take some anger management classes, JS

Blair: Oh boy, well hormones.  This is my only excuse for your current actions.  Hormones and the fact that you are pregnant 20 year old who just finally realized that things around you were moving just a little too fast.  Still the right thing to do, if you don’t want to be with your fiancé anymore, is to tell him before you go off riding with some other guy in a limo.  Yeah, Chuck kind of pushed himself on you but you could have said, no, I need to talk to Louis first.  Whatever though, I still love you.  You’re head just isn’t in the right place now.

Dan:  Seriously, if you are gonna get all mopey on me, oh wait you never did stop moping…  Well stop flip flopping, either man up and tell Blair how you feel or just go and throw yourself into something else like normal people do when they can’t be with the person they love.

Nate:  Since when did you decide that Chuck should sweep Blair away?  I guess you must be tired of living with him.  Here’s a thought, instead of meddling with a pregnant lady’s love life just move out.  It’s not like you are hurting for money.

Rufus and Lily: Just get a clue.  At least you love all of your “kids”

Ivy: Are you really going?  Nah, I don’t buy it.  You are a series regular.  Okay see you next year!

Serena:  You are a biatch, ‘noug said.

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4 thoughts on “Gossip Girl Review: Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked

  1. Hello my wonderful Abelle! Of course I love your review. Especially the Serena = FML. God I so can’t stand her! Okay I finally commented on your review so please get off my back. LOVE YOU!!!!

  2. I love your comments to all the characters. So cute and totally true! Although I do understand where Serena is coming from even though she acted bitchy! And lol of course Chuck won’t die and Ivy won’t leave. GG is so obvious sometimes. 😉 Excited for January though!

  3. I totally agree with everything you pointed out. Why cant we just some Dair action already. We just need someone to get Dan to take his own advice and jump in with both feet or take a risk and maybe have everything. Blair just needs to realize that there is someone out there that will love her for who she truly is other than Chuck. Cant wait to read what happens in the next 3 episode 😀

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